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Alana Mokma

My Friend Chase

Last Tuesday I shared how my accidental intoxication turned me into a bar-hopping-stage-dancing-alcohol-drinker. If you missed it, check it out here.

Of course, being a student and working part-time, I could not maintain this lifestyle of going to the bar five nights a week. Well, physically, I was maintaining it fine. 😉 It was the finances that began to unravel. Continue reading

Did You See This One?

Happy Thanksgiving, friends!

In lieu of new content today, I am highlighting a few of the most recent popular posts. If you’ve missed any of these, I highly recommend you check them out. They are electric!

Your Story: Kim Lincoln
I had to acknowledge how sexual abuse played a part in how I perceived my body and in what I have done to protect myself at all costs, including how I have used food and my weight to both shield my emotions and keep people at bay.

Your Story: Abigail Livingston
I was taught that “true love waits”, meaning that I should not have sex until I get married. There was not much else shared about romantic relationships as I was growing up even in church-and I was definitely not allowed to date.

Your Story: Joy McMillan
A people pleaser par excellence. It would seem I had every reason to succeed at life. All the makings of a healthy, well-rounded, confident young lady. But something was horribly wrong behind the scenes as my mystery wounds festered, alone in the basement of my heavy little heart.

Your Story: Emily Maynard
But somewhere along the way, my name got twisted up. Somehow, somewhere, I took on the name of “Does Everything One,” which quickly turned into “Disappointed One,” “Self-Berating One,” “Flakey One,” and “Exhausted One.” And let me tell you, these titles are even less fun in real life than they are on this page.

The Introvert
A few months ago, I struggled with my perception of “the introvert.” My experience has been that he is quiet, doesn’t want to talk, makes me feel uncomfortable because he doesn’t want to talk, and it seems he could care less if he knew me or didn’t know me. This didn’t make me feel special, and I want to feel special.

New content next Tuesday! [I continue my story of how my love for alcohol changed my life.]

In the comment section, caption this photo.

Keep Going

Written on: August 20, 2012.

Today I had the idea to begin writing letters to myself and setting the publish date so it would be anywhere from 3-6 months in the future. Not sure how this is going to play out yet, and I’m a litte nervous about how my “future” self is going to take what my “now” self says, but I’m all about experiments. So let’s try this and see what happens!

Dear Alana,
You’ve been working really hard to figure out what it is you want to do with your life. You’ve been bashful and shy because you feel like you need to have it all figured out, especially because you are claiming you can help others figure their lives out. Well, the truth is. You won’t have it all figured out. At least that’s what Michael Good says. If that’s the truth, then WOW! You’ve been putting a lot of unneeded pressure on yourself.

I know you are frustrated right now. You sometimes wonder if all that you are doing is worth it. Do people really care what you have to say? Yes… and if they don’t care. Guess what? They still need to hear it. You, my dear, are an incredibly gifted woman. You put yourself out there and share vulnerabilities that many would be unwilling to even expose to themselves.

Today, I want to tell you to keep going. I believe in you. It doesn’t matter how many people are following your blog, how many people are commenting or interacting. It doesn’t matter if your business has exploded and you now have a long list of people who want to talk to you, be your friend or do business with you.

What does matter, is this: Are you continuing to learn how to love yourself? Because really, that’s all it’s about. Loving yourself and then sharing that love and teaching others how to love themselves too.

Well, that’s all I’ve got for you today. You have what it takes. Believe in yourself. You will do great things.

Your past self

The Bouncers Knew Me By Name

Once I realized how alcohol could boost my confidence, [backstory here] it quickly became part of my weekly regimen. From 2002 – 2004, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights = bar night. Despite this, I somehow managed to maintain a 3.0 – 4.0 throughout college. I did get a 1.0 in one of my classes and that was directly tied to my new-found social life. Continue reading

Intoxicated Me

The first time I became drunk, I was 22 years old. I had moved from my hometown in Lansing, MI to Grand Rapids to go to college. Growing up, I was taught that drinking was bad. Or at least, “Don’t drink until you turn 21 and it is legal.” To my knowledge, my parents never had alcohol in the house, so I wasn’t really exposed to it. In high school, I had friends who partied and drank at a young age, but I was too naive to realize it then. I maintained a strong conviction that I was not going to drink until I was of legal age. On my 21st birthday, I was on a mission trip in another country, so that pretty much nixed that opportunity. Continue reading

Becoming the Predator

Over the past few weeks I have shared bits of my story – how I wasn’t the popular girl and that people made fun of me for being a failure. I mean, who does 6th grade twice? —>this girl<—. 😉

But, things weren’t always like this.

Sometime between 7th and 8th grade, I became a cheerleader. Continue reading